The two sacred institutions given in Eden have in recent years, come under increasing attack by the secular forces, moved upon by the enemy of all righteousness, with two specific purposes in mind: [1] To destroy the foundation of society, of which God-ordained marriage forms an integral part. [2] To destroy the foundation of God’s Government upon the earth, through the introduction of false worship, and idolatry.
This is the reason why the Sabbath, and Marriage are the main subjects of a well-coordinated frontal assault from foes within and without. But we are called, as Christians, to restore the breaches that were made in God’s will for the human family, and as such, we are cautioned in the Bible not to offer any substitutions, or amendments to God’s word for the sake of incorporating our personal ideas, opinions, and preferences. Let’s read:
Isaiah 58:12 And they that shall be of thee shall build the old waste places: thou shalt raise up the foundations of many generations; and thou shalt be called, The repairer of the breach, The restorer of paths to dwell in.
For this reason, we must let the word of God speak authoritatively, for by so doing, the gold standard for marriages will be set, without interference from human devising. But there are three very important points to consider and understand clearly, if we are to receive God’s word objectively:
[1] The laws of God’s government are given with the best intentions, and purposes for the human family, as well as the unfallen worlds. But in some instances, those laws and instructions may not rub us the right way, because they may appear to go contrary to conventional modes of thought, and action.
Thus, because logic is often the diabolical enemy of faith, we will find ourselves swimming upstream at times, in order to harmonize with what is written in the Bible, rather than go with the flow downstream, which always leads to perdition. It is vain to expect that everything God instructs us to do will sit well with our opinions, and therefore, the mind of faith will always accept God’s word as the final authority in all matters, whether it seems to make sense, or not. Let’s read:
Isaiah 55:8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.
9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 For as the rain cometh down, and the snow from heaven, and returneth not thither, but watereth the earth, and maketh it bring forth and bud, that it may give seed to the sower, and bread to the eater:
11 So shall my word be that goeth forth out of my mouth: it shall not return unto me void, but it shall accomplish that which I please, and it shall prosper in the thing whereto I sent it.
[2] The status of whatsoever God declares to be wrong or right in His word, does not change with the passage of time, nor does His laws ever conform to custom, or culture. Indeed, the validity, and the immutability of God’s law cannot be judged by what popular opinion enjoins, or by how many folks may agree or disagree, for His word stands aloof of all human interference. Let’s read:
Psalms 119:89 Forever, O Lord, thy word is settled in heaven.
90 Thy faithfulness is unto all generations.
142 Thy righteousness is an everlasting righteousness, and thy law is the truth.
[3] God does make allowances for those times of ignorance, when spouses may not have known any better, or where sound, scriptural counsel was not available. In such cases, The Lord has the final say in whether a divorce is warranted or not. However, in such cases, His circumstantial will should never be interpreted as being His ideal will, and the various accommodations He may have granted in certain instances should never to be presented as doctrine.
For instance, in Hosea’s case, God gave the prophet clearance to go marry a prostitute, for the specific purpose of demonstrating in real time, His love for His people, who on many occasions, were unfaithful in their relationship with Him, over, and over again. This case however does not give a Christian man the clearance to go by Tootsies looking for a wife, nor is the prophet Hosea to ever declare from the pulpit, that because God had authorized his own marriage, that it can now be used as a precedent for future generations. Absolutely not!
The following four points therefore, are some of the main issues pertaining to marriage relations, which God has already adequately addressed in His word. The deductions made will be supported by the Bible and thus, should resolve any questions or concerns we may have had on these matters.
[1] The urge to merge is a God-ordained desire, but it must only be fulfilled in the context of marriage. If this law is violated for any reason, the foundation of society begins to be chipped away resulting in much more harm than good, not only to those who are thus exercised, but also to the local community, the church and the nation as a whole, for the adverse ripple effects can often reach as far as the federal government, via the social security administration, as well as the judicial system.
In other words having premarital sex is a sin, to put it plainly, even though this statement will never square with the popular, majority opinion. Let’s read:
Genesis 2:18 And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
22 And the rib, which the Lord God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
23 And Adam said, this is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
Exodus 20:14 Thou shalt not commit adultery.
Without introducing any technicalities, loop holes, Hebrew, and Greek to confuse our understanding, these two passages declare that any sexual relation, outside of the God-ordained institution, is a form of adultery, ranging in scope from being sinful to being an abomination, as is currently the case with same-sex marriages. God’s mercies, and forgiveness never change the definition of either marriage or adultery.
[2] Having sexual, or any intimate physical relations after menopause should be encouraged, wherever possible, because the physical interaction between husbands, and wives is just as much a part of any healthy marriage, as are the other spiritual aspects, such as love, kindness, and courtesy. In addition to this, our church duties should not be permitted to excuse or preclude, anyone from having intimate relationships with his, or her spouse, and this also covers the practice of celibacy. God is abundantly clear on these points. Let’s read:
1st Corinthians 7:5 Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.
Genesis 18:9 And they said unto him, Where is Sarah thy wife? And he said, Behold, in the tent.
10 And he said, I will certainly return unto thee according to the time of life; and, lo, Sarah thy wife shall have a son. And Sarah heard it in the tent door, which was behind him.
11 Now Abraham and Sarah were old and well stricken in age; and it ceased to be with Sarah after the manner of women.
12 Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?
13 And the Lord said unto Abraham, Wherefore did Sarah laugh, saying, Shall I of a surety bear a child, which am old?
14 Is anything too hard for the Lord? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.
15 Then Sarah denied, saying, I laughed not; for she was afraid.
Luke 1:5 There was in the days of Herod, a certain priest named Zacharias, of the course of Abia: and is wife was of the daughters of Aaron, and her name was Elisabeth.
6 And they were both righteous before God, walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blameless.
7 And they had no child, because that Elisabeth was barren, and they both were now well stricken in years.
8 And it came to pass, that while he executed the priest's office before God,
11 There appeared unto him an angel of the Lord standing on the right side of the altar of incense.
12 And when Zacharias saw him, he was troubled, and fear fell upon him.
13 But the angel said unto him, Fear not, Zacharias: for thy prayer is heard; and thy wife Elisabeth shall bear thee a son, and thou shalt call his name John.
14 And thou shalt have joy and gladness; and many shall rejoice at his birth.
1st Timothy 3:1 This is a true saying, if a man desire the office of a bishop, he desireth a good work.
2 A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behavior.
[3] If two atheists, or two Hindus get married, that union is considered as one that God has "Joined" together, even if they did not consult Him first. The choices that we make as it pertains to marriage, are ratified in heaven, whether we believe in Christ or not, because it's the institution that is sacred. Those who get married with, or without God's guidance or consent, are recorded, and are considered as being joined together in the sight of God.
However, that does not necessarily mean that He approves of the union, but it is recorded and also considered as such in heaven. To put it plainly, a husband and wife do not have to be Christians, in order for God to recognize their marriage vows as binding in heaven.
Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
The words “a man” is an unqualified phrase, to which no man-made ideas, and opinions should be added, for the Bible explicitly states that we should not add unto His words. Therefore, a Catholic man, a Hindu man, an Atheist man, a Muslim man, and an Adventist man, are all included in this declaration, for it is all-inclusive, and not to be consigned to only those who believe in Christ.
If a man and a woman of any faith, or of any belief system join hands in matrimony, that marriage is considered as “joined” in God’s sight, and therefore, the same respect, and instructions guarding their marriage will also apply across the board. Two of Lot’s daughters were at least nominal believers, but they got married to men living in Sodom. When the angels asked about their whereabouts, the question posed to Lot shows that their marriages were at that time recognized as such in heaven. Let’s read:
Genesis 19:1 And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing them rose up to meet them; and he bowed himself with his face toward the ground;
12 And the men said unto Lot, Hast thou here any besides? son in law, and thy sons, and thy daughters, and whatsoever thou hast in the city, bring them out of this place:
13 For we will destroy this place, because the cry of them is waxen great before the face of the Lord; and the Lord hath sent us to destroy it.
14 And Lot went out, and spake unto his sons in law, which married his daughters, and said, Up, get you out of this place; for the Lord will destroy this city.
Matthew 19:4 "And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, 5 And said, they twain shall be one flesh? 6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder"....
Furthermore, if an Adventist and a Catholic were to get married, that marriage, even though it may be ill-advised, is recorded as legally binding in heaven, and therefore, the differences of beliefs supply no ground for divorce whatsoever, except in such cases where the unbelieving one chooses to leave. This is one of the gray areas where God has made ample provision for difficult circumstances, but the divorce proceedings should not be initiated by the believing one, but instead by the unbeliever. Let’s read:
1st Corinthians 7:12 If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.
13 And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him.
14 For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband.
15 But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace.
16 For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?
17 But as God hath distributed to every man, as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk. And so ordain I in all churches.
[4] Marriage with unbelievers, or those of any other persuasion, although it is contrary to the instruction and command of God, is something which has taken place throughout the old, and new testament time periods. Very serious problems will most likely arise in such instances, because our actions and decisions are guided for the most part by what we do believe.
What often takes place in such marriages, is that forbearance may be manifested initially, until the euphoria of the moment gradually passes, and then, in many instances, the spouses will return to their old selves, and their former beliefs. Believe it or not, the older a person gets, it’s the more unlikely they are to change their ways, except through the direct intervention of Christ.
Thus, the following passages cover all those other “causes”, with the exception of adultery, which for some reason two people cannot get along, and then find it necessary to separate. Although this should be the last resort, yet in many instances, problems within the marriage may not be able to be resolved, and wherever that is the case, the husband and wife may opt to part company, but with one caveat. Let’s read:
1st Corinthians 7:10 And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband.
11 But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
What is noticeably absent in this last passage is any specific reason, for which parting ways may seem to be warranted. The reason why it is left open-ended, is so that it can cover every other reason why living together may simply become impossible. Although this is a difficult truth to swallow, yet it is what God says, for if He were to once open the floodgates of reasons, opinions, and ideas, then, both men and women will think it quite acceptable to separate for “Every cause”, and the sacred institution, meant for the stability of society, will become an open door by which husbands and wives will go in, and out for the most trivial reasons.
Whatever our situation might be, God wants us to make the best of it by His grace, and wherever it’s possible to avoid divorce. Therefore, the following instructions will go a long way in preserving our marriages, or mending broken hearts, wherever mending may be possible. Let’s read:
Ephesians 4:31 Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamor, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice:
32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish.
28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.
29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church:
30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones.
31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.
May God add His blessing to the study and practice of His word.
God bless!