Because the sin of adultery has now become center stage in high and low places, and because of the serious nature of this sin, and it’s adverse effects on marriages, families, societies, and nations, The Lord desires that we now take an introspect look, to see if the “Breaking news” may strike a corresponding chord in our personal lives, for it will be discovered that adultery is much more prevalent in Christian churches, than many realize.
If it were to be judged solely on external actions, it would be limited in scope, but if adultery was to be assessed at the thought level, it will be found to be a much more extensive and pervasive problem than many Christians would like to admit. For this reason we will do today’s study from the indulgent thought level, just as God sees it.
In addition, we must address several questions that pertain to the issue, either directly or indirectly such as:
[1] When does adultery occur?
[2] To whom should confession be made?
[3] How to deal with the issue of “Sleeping dogs?
[4] When and if one’s spouse should be notified?
[5] Does confession involve risk?
[6] What does true confession look like?
[7] How does God forgive this sin?
[8] What if he/she does it again?
We will use as our case study the sin of David with Bathsheba, because such occurrences are known to be quite prevalent, and the circumstances, results, and ramifications are quite similar to what many of us may have gone through. Therefore, we will begin
by answering the very first question: [1] When does adultery occur? Let’s read:
Matthew 5:27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: 8 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
Proverbs 6:25 Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her take thee with her eyelids.
James 1:13 Let no man say when he is tempted, I am tempted of God.
14 But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.
15 Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.
Proverbs 1:10 My son, if sinners entice thee, consent thou not.
When taken together, line upon line, these verses teach us that adultery, like all other sins, takes place in the mind, with the overt actions merely being a by-product of what was thought about previously, and subsequently decided upon. Therefore, it is not necessary for any actions to take place after one’s mind has been made up, for at that point adultery, as an action becomes just a matter of opportunity.
When the scriptures use the word “Consent” it is referring to consent to the sinful thought, not only the sinful act. Thus, it is quite possible that David had committed the sin of adultery long before he saw Bathsheba, because, although he had seen her at an opportune moment, yet indeed, it could have been any other woman who would have fit his own mental profile of lustful desire. In other words, it just happened to be Bathsheba.
If like David, men and women are harboring mental profiles of anyone other than their spouse, then the sin of adultery has already taken root in their minds, and like David, it will just be a matter of time before the opportune moment arises, with anyone who fits that specific profile. Thus, when Christ cautions men against lusting after feminine beauty in the heart, it is against the backdrop of a predetermined profile that is cherished, whatever that profile may be.
If we were to observe closely, we will see a specific physical profile resurfacing over and over again, in the saga of one prominent person today, which tells us that if we ourselves are harboring any personal, or secret profiles, the devil already knows what they are, and he will absolutely match such profiles with the right person, at the opportune moment.
With this description, adultery is apparently more pervasive in Christian, and secular circles, than we may realize. In fact, when Voodoo failed with the Hebrews, Balaam turned to adultery, and the rest is history, for then it was made manifest that several of the elders, deacons, and the leaders of the many conferences back then, were secretly harboring the same sin as David, with their own personal profiles.
Then, when the opportune moment was presented, the sin that had been cherished previously was now acted upon in overt actions. The problem that we’re seeing on the national stage is in fact actively being repeated in many Christian hearts, but some do not have the “Hush” money, or the legal expertise to try to clear themselves. Let’s read:
[Patriarchs & Prophets pp 459] A long preparatory process, unknown to the world, goes on in the heart before the Christian commits open sin. The mind does not come down at once from purity and holiness to depravity, corruption, and crime. It takes time to degrade those formed in the image of God to the satanic. By the indulgence of impure thoughts man can so educate his mind that sin which he once loathed will become pleasant to him.
Numbers 25:1 And Israel abode in Shittim, and the people began to commit whoredom with the daughters of Moab.
2 And they called the people unto the sacrifices of their gods: and the people did eat and bowed down to their gods.
6 And, behold, one of the children of Israel came and brought unto his brethren a Midianitish woman in the sight of Moses, and in the sight of all the congregation of the children of Israel, who were weeping before the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.
Exodus 32:6 And they rose up early on the morrow, and offered burnt offerings and brought peace offerings; and the people sat down to eat and to
drink and rose up to play.
25 And when Moses saw that the people were naked;
26 Then Moses stood in the gate of the camp, and said, Who is on the Lord's side?
This leads us to our next two questions: [2] To whom should confession be made? And, [3] How to deal with the issue of “Sleeping dogs?
In cases of adultery, confession should first be made to God, for any sin is primarily an infraction against our Maker. David alluded to this when he said in his confessions: “Against thee have I sinned, and done this great wickedness”. However, confession to the other spouse must also be addressed, for whenever a person is wronged or wounded, whether in secret or publicly, the offended one should be notified.
When Zacchaeus made full proof of repentance to Christ, he restored fourfold to those whom he had wronged, even though they may not have been aware that such wrongs had taken place. Infidelity in marriage is similar, for even though the wife may not know, yet a grievous wrong has been done to her person, and though it be quite painful, or even risky, yet the one who has sinned must inform the other party.
A husband or wife can never deal truthfully whilst hiding the knowledge of an act of infidelity, because there will be a constant, unspoken uneasiness on the part of the one who has committed the act. God is a Spirit of truth, and thus, any secret rendezvous being held close to his/her vest, whilst singing God’s praises cannot be acceptable in His sight, for it is a form of living a lie. Let’s read:
Matthew 18:15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone.
James 5:16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
[That I May Know Him pp 260] If we would offer acceptable prayer, there is a work to be done in confessing our sins to one another. If I have sinned against my neighbor in word or action I should make confession to him. If he has wronged me he should confess to me. So far as is possible the one who has wronged another is to make restitution. Then in contrition he is to confess the sin to God, whose law has been transgressed.
[A.H. pp 177] There is a sacred circle around every family which should be preserved. No other one has any right in that sacred circle. The husband and wife should be all to each other. The wife should have no secrets to keep from her husband and let others know. And the husband should have no secrets to keep from his wife to relate to others. The heart of his wife should be the grave for the faults of the husband, and the heart of the husband the grave for his wife's faults.
This will call for a willingness to deal with whatever consequences might ensue as a direct result of such a disclosure as adultery, but yet it should be done, since true repentance always includes a willingness on the part of the offender to deal with the fallout of his or her actions.
In some instances, the fallout might even include physical violence against the offender, and it may include an unwillingness to forgive and forget, or it may include a divorce, it may also involve punitive, financial damages.
The question confronting the offender in such cases will involve a choice between being truthful and forthcoming, regardless of the consequences, or whether to let “Sleeping dogs lie” to avoid the risk of separation, a broken home, and/or a damaged reputation, etc.
For Biblical answers on such a difficult subject, let’s turn to the experience of David with Bathsheba. The only 4 persons with knowledge of their rendezvous were [1] God. [2] Satan. [3] David. [4] Bathsheba. If David was to tell Uriah what had happened, it could spill over into the public square, and possibly spark a nationwide riot, with Uriah demanding the head of the king on a platter!
Then, if that were to occur, the whole nation would know, and the Hebrew Enquirer back then might be running back to back coverage of the affair, with all of the juicy details, tailormade to satisfy the hunger of gossip mongers. Then comes the issue of national embarrassment for David’s family, for his children might be taunted at school and church, and certain church folk might be seen grimacing every time he opened his mouth to preach.
Confession in cases of adultery can potentially be risky on several levels, for it is only God who can guarantee forgiveness when confession is made to Him. But this is not always the case with the human agent, for some spouses become so deeply hurt by the betrayal of sacred trust, that it can be quite a difficult challenge to forgive, let alone forget.
Thus, on the issue of risk, the servant of The Lord offers an insightful commentary on the potential for fallout. Let’s read:
[Patriarchs & Prophets pp 718>719] None could foresee what would be the result should the crime become known. The law of God pronounced the adulterer guilty of death, and the proud-spirited soldier, so shamefully wronged, might avenge himself by taking the life of the king or by exciting the nation to revolt. Every effort which David made to conceal his guilt proved unavailing. He had betrayed himself into the power of Satan; danger surrounded him, dishonor more bitter than death was before him. There appeared but one way of escape and in desperation he was hurried on to add murder to adultery.
Thus, the burning question is asked again: “Should David share this sensitive information with Uriah, or should he keep it quiet between himself, Bathsheba and God? Will God accept his repentance if he kept it private, or must a disclosure be made to Uriah, and potentially the entire nation. For answers we turn again to the scriptures. Let’s read:
2nd Samuel 12:1 And the Lord sent Nathan unto
David. And he came unto him, and said unto him, there were two men in one city; the one rich, and the other poor.
2 The rich man had exceeding many flocks and herds:
3 But the poor man had nothing, save one little ewe lamb, which he had bought and nourished up: and it grew up together with him, and with his children; it did eat of his own meat, and drank of his own cup, and lay in his bosom, and was unto him as a daughter.
4 And there came a traveler unto the rich man, and he spared to take of his own flock and of his own herd, to dress for the wayfaring man that was come unto him; but took the poor man's lamb, and dressed it for the man that was come to him.
5 And David's anger was greatly kindled against the man; and he said to Nathan, As the Lord liveth, the man that hath done this thing shall surely die:
6 And he shall restore the lamb fourfold, because
he did this thing, and because he had no pity.
7 And Nathan said to David, Thou art the man. Thus saith the Lord God of Israel, I anointed thee king over Israel, and I delivered thee out of the hand of Saul;
9 Wherefore hast thou despised the commandment of the Lord, to do evil in his sight? thou hast killed Uriah the Hittite with the sword, and hast taken his wife to be thy wife, and hast slain him with the sword of the children of Ammon.
10 Now therefore the sword shall never depart from thine house; because thou hast despised me, and hast taken the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be thy wife.
11 Thus saith the Lord, Behold, I will raise up evil against thee out of thine own house, and I will take thy wives before thine eyes, and give them unto thy neighbor, and he shall lie with thy wives in the sight of this sun.
12 For thou didst it secretly: but I will do this thing before all Israel, and before the sun.
Many Christians may be disturbed about why this episode in the life of a great prophet has been made public in the scriptures, and others may not understand why God said David will be exposed before the sun. The truth of the matter is that God is the one who seeks to shield our reputation from smear and scandal, whilst satan is the one who delights in accusing the brethren.
Thus, by stating that David will be entirely exposed, God is saying that He will not intervene to stop the Hebrew Enquirer from running the story, for David’s sin had caused the protection of God to be partially removed, making him vulnerable to the assaults of satan, who takes delight in character assassination, slander, and national embarrassment. Let’s read:
[P&P pp 722>723] Very many, reading the history of David's fall, have inquired, “Why has this record been made public? Why did God see fit to throw open to the world this dark passage in the life of one so highly honored of Heaven?” The prophet, in his reproof to David, had declared concerning his sin, “By this deed thou hast given great occasion to the enemies of the Lord to blaspheme”.
Heretofore God's providence had preserved David against all the plottings of his enemies, and had been directly exercised to restrain Saul. But David's transgression had changed his relation to God. The Lord could not in any wise sanction iniquity. He could not exercise His power to protect David from the results of his sin as He had protected him from the enmity of Saul.
Those who may be hoping, and praying that the current scandals would just vanish into thin air are either indulging in wishful thinking or are ignorant of how the sacred laws of cause and effect do work, which are often left to run their natural course. The results of one departure from integrity and virtue can make for a lifetime of repentance, which leads us to our next question: How does God forgive the sin of adultery? Let’s read:
John 3: 16 For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.
17 For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved.
1st John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
Matthew 12:31 Wherefore I say unto you, All manner of sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven unto men: but the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men.
This last passage which warns us against blasphemy against The Holy Ghost is of critical importance at this juncture, and leads us to our last and final question: What if he/she does it again? Now, while it is true that God will forgive every single sin that is confessed and truly repented of, yet, it is dangerous to repeat offenses.
The reason for this is that once the dogs have been let loose, it becomes easier the next time to fall into the same error, and if that pattern is not reversed by the grace of God, and through sensible choices, the person in question will eventually be fastened in the iron grip of sin, and will lose both the desire and the will to overcome, for every indulgence weakens resistance, and a pattern of bad behavior can take a permanent toll on character. Let’s read:
2nd Peter 2:20 For if after they have escaped the pollutions of the world through the knowledge of the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, they are again entangled therein, and overcome, the latter end is worse with them than the beginning.
21 For it had been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than, after they have known it, to turn from the holy commandment delivered unto them.
22 But it is happened unto them according to the true proverb, The dog is turned to his own vomit again; and the sow that was washed to her wallowing in the mire.
Galatians 4:9 But now, after that ye have known God, or rather are known of God, how turn ye again to the weak and beggarly elements, whereunto ye desire again to be in bondage?
Matthew 12:43 When the unclean spirit is gone out of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest, and findeth none.
44 Then he saith, I will return into my house from
whence I came out; and when he is come, he findeth it empty, swept, and garnished.
45 Then goeth he, and taketh with himself seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter in and dwell there: and the last state of that man is worse than the first.
In closing, it’s important for us to think soberly, and live righteously in this generation, for all the stops are being pulled out, and a last-ditch effort is being launched, to overthrow the people of God, even as we stand on the brink of the eternal world. Thus, in lieu of the prospect before us, and for the constant bombardment of evil being spewed, to desensitize the unwary, we must close with a word from the prophet to our own souls. Let’s read:
Patriarchs & Prophets pp 457>458] “Now all these things happened unto them for ensamples: and they are written for our admonition, upon whom the ends of the world are come. Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed lest he fall.” 1 Corinthians 10:11, 12. Satan well knows the material with which he has to deal in the human heart. He knows—for he has studied with fiendish intensity for thousands of years—the points most easily assailed in every character; and through successive generations he has wrought to overthrow the strongest men, princes in Israel, by the same temptations that were so successful at Baalpeor.
All along through the ages there are strewn wrecks of character that have been stranded upon the rocks of sensual indulgence. As we approach the close of time, as the people of God stand upon the borders of the heavenly Canaan, Satan will, as of old, redouble his efforts to prevent them from entering the goodly land. He lays his snares for every soul. It is not the ignorant and uncultured merely that need to be guarded; he will prepare his temptations for those in the highest positions, in the most holy office; if he can lead them to pollute their souls, he can through them destroy many.
And he employs the same agents now as he employed three thousand years ago. By worldly friendships, by the charms of beauty, by pleasure seeking, mirth, feasting, or the wine cup, he tempts to the violation of the seventh commandment.
Jude 1:24 Now unto him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of his glory with exceeding joy,
25 To the only wise God our Savior, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Amen.
God bless!